CrazyTown: Enter Mary Sue!
by NeoExplosion
Summary: This is the second installment in my series of parody fics. This follows Josephinea Alicia-Lucille Herwokawits as she learns a deep, dark secret that will change the world! Please, read, review, and enjoy!


Hi, my name is Josephinea Alicia-Lucille Herwokawits and this is my life. No one at my school ever liked me, and they would all laugh at my naturally blue ringlets and purple eyes. They also think that I look like a 12 year old, even though I am 16. I have an olive complexion, with absolutely no blemishes whatsoever. I do have a birthmark of a swirly sun on my left arm, and it glows green. I am skinny enough to be anorexic, even though I eat all the time. I dress in mostly preppy clothes, but everyone at my school likes rebel clothes.

Did I mention I go to school for delinquents, even though I've done nothing wrong? I always get A's and I tested gifted, but they still leave me here. Everyone must hate me for it, since the teachers love me. My true friends, who no one else likes, call me Jo-Jo. Gary is incredibly smart and Mary is ridiculously beautiful. But unfortunately, I would never see them again.

My father raises me alone since my mother died at childbirth, her last words supposedly being Osiris. He doesn't make much money, and most of it he spends on beer. He always ignores me, and just gives me twenty bucks once a week for food and whatever.

The only time anyone pays attention to me is when I sing, since I am told that I have an amazing singing voice. I also play a variety of instruments, including, the piano, guitar, and tambourine.

Something weird though, is that I have been told that I have an Egyptian accent and I do really well with anything Egypt related. I love animals, so I volunteer at the shelter in my free time. But enough about me.

One night I had a dream where a blue glowing man saved me from my burning school, being destroyed by a man in glowing red. He told me that I was the only daughter of Osiris ever conceived, and that my training mudt begin immediately.

I woke up in a luxury apartment and walked down the hall to find that there were other rooms, and a lot of people now staring at me. I see an African-American boy staring at me, obviously interested in me, a caucasian girl staring at me with fire in her eyes, and a lot of other people. The boy introduced himself, "Hi, I'm Carter Kane, and this is Sadie. And you are?"

"I am Josephinea Alicia-Lucille Herwokawits, only daughter of Osiris."

"Oh we know that, we just needed your name. Mind if we call you Jo?"

"No, not at all!"

"So, apparently, you already have all the knowledge necessary to fight, and the powers of a god. You have to defeat the Anti-Osiris, and then you get to become a full-fledged god. Okay with you?"

"Okie-Dokie."

"We already packed for you. Here is your charm necklace."

"What is it?" I said, glancing at it and putting it on my neck.

"It is the Per-Ankh, the symbol for the House of Life, and you officially are a magician. Let's go to the airport so we can get to New Orleans! I'll explain on the way."

On the plane I met Zia Rashid, Bast, the goddess of cats, and Hathor the god of music. Apparently Anti-Osiris wants to rid the world of music and joy, so he started heading to New Orleans. That's where we will battle him to the death.

After five hours we made it there just in time for Mardi Gras! We partied all night long and Hathor confessed his love for me and we kissed. I told him we would be together forever, which we would, since he is totally hot.

Then Anti-Osiris appeared in the middle of me and Hathor's wedding! So we battled him. Called called on my avatar with Carter and mine looks like an Egyptian princess with my face. I pulled out my bow and arrow and shot with deadly accuracy. He swung his sword, but it bounced off my purple avatar.

I saw Sadie get knocked onto the concrete and Zia and Hathor run to protect her while she finished her spell. She blacked out and I had to finish it for her. "Begone *invokes secret name*!" And a huge flash of rainbow light filled the town and we were back at home, Anti-Osiris defeated, when I went to the fridge.

Carter asked, "What are you doing?"

And I replied nonchalantly, "Getting a ginger ale."


End file.
